There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
