This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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