Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
