Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
