He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
