She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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