just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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