I bet he comes in French.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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