what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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