Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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