Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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