my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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