Define "chronic" masturbator.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize