SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
