That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
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