Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
