apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
