Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(389): View more from

So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"

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(937): View more from Ohio

there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts

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(613): View more from Ontario

Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww

(1-613): View more from Ontario

no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call

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(720): View more from Colorado

haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came

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