genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
don't judge my taste in strippers
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
