how can u be prego again
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I think im going to throw up on grandma
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize