you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
