So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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