She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
