pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
