I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
