I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
