when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
