Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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