absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
