Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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