I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
