You're so nebulous sometimes
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
