I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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