Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize