great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i can't believe i had my finger in that
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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