too bad you live with your parents still
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
