Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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