Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
