Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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