what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
