Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
