wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
