i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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