There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
