I got her a Nickelback box set.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
