So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize