im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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