Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize