Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize