We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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