Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
